CoNfuSiOn
by XShiori-chanX
Summary: Who was I? I was Roxas. Who was She? She was Namine. -HAPPY NAMIXAS DAY-


_**-C oNf Usio N-**_

**_Thoughts..._**

**_creations of the mind._**

**_endless rain, showering ideas. _**

**_i don't own Kingdom Hearts._**

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_Don't you want to know the truth? About who you really are?_

Nothing makes sense at first. I should know: After all, I am Roxas.

Who was I, really? I was Roxas. Bearer of keys, keeper of Destiny. But deep inside, I was someone else. Who was I?

Who was she? A witch in white, a symphony without a sound. Her blue eyes looked so familiar, like the ocean I hadn't been to in a couple years, like the calm before the storm. She always wore a dress of pure white; it always blended in with her pale, milky skin and her silky bleached locks. Whenever I saw her in town--on those rare occasions where she stopped time, causing me to go into a panic--she was smiling. It was a smile that explained a lot of things, but said nothing. I watched her smile at the flowers, smile towards the sun; she even smiled at Hayner, Pence, and Olette, although I knew they couldn't see her. She smiled at buildings, she smiled at nature. But she saved her best smile for me. An ear to ear grin, goofy yet mysterious, a smile that reached her eyes and sent a gleam so radiant shooting my way. I was always left tongue-tied after those.

But still, Who was I? I was Roxas. Blonde spiky hair, bright blue eyes. But deep inside, I was a brunette. Who was I?

She asked me one time. _"Do you remember you true name?" _what was a true name? she knew my true name, for she said it seconds before. But she was heavily implying something, something I couldn't put my finger on. What was a true name? _Sora_. That was the name that came to my thought, but it wasn't familiar. There was no Sora in any of my high school classes, or anywhere in the town, for that matter. But I could feel the connection with his name--it meant something important to me.

Who was I? Was I really Roxas? Of course I was. I was Roxas, bearer of keys, keeper of destiny, with blonde hair and blue eyes. But who was I, really?

There was a guy that stopped the struggle tournament one time. He had deep, blood red hair, and piercing emerald eyes. He said cryptic, scary things like _she_ did. After declaring proudly that his name was indeed Axel, (so familiar…but I still couldn't put my finger on it) he exclaimed, _"This town is his creation, right? Then we don't have time for a Q and A." _what did he mean, exactly? The town was created by someone? Well, obviously. But it was different-- a part of me understood what he was trying to imply, while the other stood dumbstruck and confused. I would ask Namine later what he was saying.

But it still didn't answer my question. Who was I? I was Roxas. Failure at school, winner of skateboarding. But it wasn't _right. _Who was I?

"_I wanted to meet you, at least once." _she said one time. What had she meant? She had been in my room that morning--no doubt stalking me. And if she was in the town, she must have seen me. It wasn't that big of a town. But when she smiled that Cheshire cat smile, my thoughts were silenced, and all I could see was her. The way she fanned out her fingers when she was nervous, the way her eyes shone when she was determined. I watched her as she turned around, walking down the hill with such a grace that ballerinas were put to shame. And time started again.

My question still stands. Who was I? should I say who _am_ I? it feels wrong. Who _**was**_ I?

"_My name is Namine." _that was what she said the second time I had met her. But when she introduced herself as Namine, she looked sad. Hurt. Distant. Like she couldn't even recognize the name. it had me wondering; does Namine know who she really is? Was she just Namine, or someone else? Someone else who's name started with a K. Kai…

_Kairi. You're that girl he likes!_

_Please, a name!_

_You don't remember my name? thanks a lot, Kairi. Ok, I guess I can give you a hint. Starts with an S…_

Who was I? Wilder of one keyblade, or wielder of two? Who was I?

"_Roxas, use the keyblade!" _Namine once shouted, from a balcony above a terrible scene filled with white swaying creatures. She looked scared--either for my life, or for hers, I don't know--and she reached for me, plunging me into darkness. When I opened my eyes, I was standing on this platform.

A boy was painted onto it, a boy with brown hair and a red outfit. He looked empty, deserted, like he wasn't in his body. In his hand was the keyblade, and he was gripping it tightly, staring at a picture of a girl right by his head.

Sora…

Who was I?! If I wasn't Roxas, that who could I be?!

"_You hold half of what he is…" _Namine? What was she? _Who_ was she? Did she exist? Or was she a figment of my imagination?

"_We will meet again. And then, we can talk about everything. I may not know it's you, you may not know it's me. But we will meet again. Someday soon. I promise!"_

She had exclaimed those words while being dragged away by a man covered in red bandages. I tried to stop him--I didn't want Namine to leave. But another man stopped me, blocking my path. I reached for her, desperate. She hadn't answered my questions! But as I muttered her name, she was gone. My thought process was gone. I felt hollow.

But now, I understand. I was Roxas, bearer of keys, keeper of destiny, with blonde hair and blue eyes. I fail at school work, I surpass in struggles and skateboarding. I questioned my existence, I didn't know why I was here. I met a girl who made me feel so funny inside; like I had a heart, like I belonged somewhere. But know I know.

My true name is Sora-- Roxas was an anagram, with an X jammed inside at random. I wield only one key blade, a sparkling silver with a yellow handle. I have brown hair, the color of milk chocolate, and it was much wilder than my previous un-kept blonde mass. I still have that blue--endless, sparkling, radiant blue. My eyes never did change, I guess. I still fail at schoolwork, and I'm not too good at skateboarding anymore. But struggle tournaments are second nature--fighting so many heartless at once was good training. I don't question my existence anymore--I'm grateful for it, and I was here for a reason. That girl I met? Well, she was the nobody of the love of my life. And to be with her forever was the best I could ever ask for.

"_So, we can together again!" _she had exclaimed moments before we would forever be free. She sounded so excited, so ready. Her smile was twice it's size, her eyes brimming with tears of joy. It was as she said. We would be together again.

I am now Sora again. Roxas…was a being who didn't exist. And for those who say he did, he belongs in the hearts of those who care about him the most. If you ask Namine, he was the only one who existed in her world; but it wasn't like she would admit it.

I guess when that portal closed, and I saw Namine vanishing along with Kairi, I got really mad. I was furious, actually. How dare Xemnas take away the one person I loved the most! I think Sora felt my anger coursing through his veins, because he smirked evilly as we charged. Riku noticed too--he smiled and let us lead.

"_Sora, we're taking this bastard down." _I hissed in his mind, my thoughts glued on Namine.

"_Roxas, language." _Sora had chided.

But in then end, naturally we were on top. Xemnas was defeated; Riku was injured. We were trapped in the realm of darkness, never to see Namine--excuse me, Kairi--again. Sora embraced the idea freely--he was happy as long as she was safe. I guess I was happy too. Namine was whole. She could feel emotions again. She could live her life the right way.

When Riku handed us that letter, we were overjoyed. Kairi had written it for Sora-- the letter signed by her name, a letter signed with love. It was enough for Sora. With his heart swelling in our chest, the door to light opened--he should have seen it. This light could only exist inside him. Reaching a hand out to his best friend, we walked in.

What was on the other side shocked both of us.

It was them: Namine and Kairi. They were waving around frantically on that beach, calling our name. Sora was beyond excited--I mean, some of it was leaking into me. I was so happy. Namine…I could see her. I could see her, and only her. I was happy to know that I wouldn't have to look through Kairi. I was happy that we were reunited once again. I was just so _happy. _

You see? Everything will make sense in the end. I was Roxas. Bearer of keys, keeper of destiny, with blonde hair and blue eyes. I failed in school, I excelled in fighting and skateboarding. I was Roxas. Was.

And she was Namine. Witch in white, symphony without sound, with pale blonde hair and ice blue eyes. She failed in fighting, and she excelled in drawing. She was Namine. Was.

And now, I am Sora, and she is Kairi. Together everyday, just like they promised us.

Together everyday.

Forever.

It all makes sense in end.

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**Ok, I know, this thing really doeesn't make much sense. don;t worry, i don't get it either. XD**

**HAPPY NAMIXAS DAY EVERYBODY! :) even though I just now found out about it...:(**

**i feel ashamed to call myself a Namixas fan. i didn't even know about their day... T.T **

**aw well. at least i posted this in time.**


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